I grew up in a strong, loving family that prioritized faith, which taught me a resilience that only develops from a strong, supportive community. In my ministry I am most inspired when I see that God ‘shows up,’ that is, when I perceive the presence of God in interactions with families and individuals. I have an example of this:

A family member with six kids and her significant other became separated. She decided to return to school to complete her bachelor’s degree, but she needed a babysitter to make this worthy goal happen. I asked a friend, a fellow parishioner, for help, and it turned out that my friend lived two blocks from the school. I genuinely feel that the Holy Spirit had a hand in this.

It may seem simple, but this is an example of the support that a faith community can offer families and parents as they navigate the joys and challenges of married life. This is also part of Christians building a civilization of love, as spoken about by Pope Saint John Paul II. In the end, God ‘shows up’ through us, through our generosity and sacrifice. Catechumenal Pathways (CP) now puts in writing how parishes and dioceses can do this more effectively.

The document underscores that preparing couples for marriage is a “true work of evangelization.”1 This quote resonates and speaks to me about how forming engaged couples is an apostolic endeavor. The Vatican document outlines distinct phases for marriage preparation and accompaniment, providing a clear roadmap for our ministry.

The first phase begins during existing youth and young adult education. This way, a Catholic has some knowledge of Church teaching on sacramental marriage before engagement. The second phase lasts only a few weeks and occurs while a couple is engaged. It proposes that parishes and programs offer more classes, small support groups, and possibly retreats for couples to encounter Christ personally and with their future spouse. CP also opens the opportunity for the intended to be recognized before the whole community in a Rite of Betrothal as an early public declaration of their intention to marry.

The third phase, the catechumenal phase, emphasizes accompanying the newlyweds in the first years of married life. It is designed to help them navigate their vocation as an intentional, lifelong journey of love with their spouse. It also recognizes the Eucharist as a married couple’s daily bread and that the whole Christian community, the body of Christ, is called to support them through prayers, practical assistance, and emotional encouragement. Though our wider culture offers some support, nothing compares to finding God in our midst as a Christ-centered faith community, poised and ready to aid us in our struggles.

Overall, CP has inspired me to engage with other marriage and family ministers in the diocese and has energized me to work intentionally for the goals of my office. Amidst societal challenges and decreasing marriage rates, I hope my office can revisit sacramental marriage preparation to support couples through the stages listed in CP. My vision is that the entire ecclesial community joins together to foster a culture of support and encouragement while deepening our understanding of the sacrament of marriage and its vital importance for individuals, families, the Church, and society.

Reflecting on the three stages suggested in the Catechumenal Pathways document, it becomes clear to me that marriages, apart from being a natural institution, are also born and sustained in the heart of the Church. It is essential to guide, protect, and intentionally form families for the benefit of all. Our Lord taught us love as total self-giving, which can be a challenging practice. However, life within a family becomes a privileged place to discover tangible persons and reasons to wholeheartedly ‘show up’ by radiating this love.

¹ Catechumenal Pathways For Married Life: Pastoral guidelines for local Churches. Libreria Editrice Vaticana. 2022.10.